"Quit" is a four letter word. A fading corridor enlightens your insight. A glowing potion is too hot to drink. A long worm hits with all of its length. A monstrous mind is a toy for ever. A ring of adornment protects against Nymphs. A rumour has it that rumours are just rumours. A smoky potion surely affects your vision. A spear might hit a nurse. A spear will hit an ettin. A tin of smoked eel is a wonderful find. A truly wise man never plays leapfrog with a unicorn. A two-handed sword usually misses. A unicorn can be tamed only by a fair maiden. A visit to the Zoo is very educational; you meet interesting animals. A wand of vibration might bring the whole cave crashing about your ears. Afraid of falling piercers? Wear a helmet! All monsters are created evil, but some are more evil than others. An elven cloak is always the height of fashion. An elven cloak protects against magic. Any small object that is accidentally dropped will hide under a larger object. Attack long worms from the rear - that is so much safer! Be careful when eating salmon - your fingers might become greasy. Be careful when throwing a boomerang - you might hit the back of your head. Better go home and hit your kids. They are just little monsters! Better go home and play with your kids. They are just little monsters! Better leave the dungeon, otherwise you might get hurt badly. Beware of dark rooms - they may be the Morgue. Beware of falling rocks, wear a helmet! Beware of wands of instant disaster. Beyond the 23-rd level lies a happy retirement in a room of your own. Blank scrolls make more interesting reading. Booksellers never read scrolls; it might carry them to far away. Booksellers never read scrolls; it might leave their shop unguarded. Dead lizards protect against a cockatrice. Death is just around the next door. Death is life's way of telling you you've been fired. Descend in order to meet more decent monsters. Direct a direct hit on your direct opponent, directing in the right direction. Don't bother about money: only Leprechauns and shopkeepers are interested. Don't forget! Large dogs are MUCH harder to kill than little dogs. Don't tell a soul you found a secret door, otherwise it isn't secret anymore. Don't throw gems. They are so precious! Besides, you might hit a roommate. Drinking might affect your health. Drop your vanity and get rid of your jewels! Pickpockets about! Dungeon expects every monster to do his duty. Dust is an armor of poor quality. Eventually all wands of striking do strike. Eventually you will come to admire the swift elegance of a retreating nymph. Ever tried to catch a flying boomerang? Every dog should be a domesticated one. Every hand has only one finger to put a ring on. You've got only two hands. So? Everybody should have tasted a scorpion at least once in his life. Fiery letters might deter monsters. First Law of Hacking: leaving is much more difficult than entering. For any remedy there is a misery. Fourth Law of Hacking: you will find the exit at the entrance. Gems are the droppings of other inmates. Gems do get a burden. Genocide on shopkeepers is punishable. Giving head to a long worm is like a long lasting reception. Good day for overcoming obstacles. Try a steeplechase. Gossip is the opiate of the depressed. Hackers do it with bugs. Half Moon tonight. (At least it's better than no Moon at all.) Hitting is the lingua franca in these regions. Hungry dogs are unreliable. Hungry? There is an abundance of food on the next level. I doubt whether nurses are virgins. I once knew a hacker who ate too fast and choked to death..... I smell a maze of twisty little passages. If a shopkeeper kicks you out of his shop, he'll kick you out of the dungeon. If you are too cute some monsters might be tempted to embrace you. If you can't learn to do it well, learn to enjoy doing it badly. If you need a wand of digging, kindly ask the minotaur. If you see nurses you better start looking somewhere for a doctor. If you turn blind: don't expect your dog to be turned into a seeing-eye dog. If you want to hit, use a dagger. If you want to rob a shop, train your dog. If you're afraid of trapdoors, just cover the floor with all you've got. Improve your environment, using a wand of rearrangement. In a hurry? Try a ride on a fast moving quasit! In need of a rest? Quaff a potion of sickness! Inside a shop you better take a look at the price tags before buying anything. It is bad manners to use a wand in a shop. It is not always a good idea to whistle for your dog. It might be a good idea to offer the unicorn a ruby. It seems you keep overlooking a sign reading "No trespassing"! It's all a matter of life and death, so beware of the undead. It's not safe to Save. Just below any trapdoor there may be another one. Just keep falling! Keep a clear mind: quaff clear potions. Keep your armours away from rust. Keep your weaponry away from acids. Kill a unicorn and you kill your luck. Latest news? Put newsgroup 'netUNX.indoor.hackers-scroll' in your .newsrc! Leprechauns hide their gold in a secret room. Liquor sellers do not drink; they hate to see you twice. Looking pale? Quaff a red potion! M.M.Vault cashiers teleport any amount of gold to the next local branch. Many monsters make a murdering mob. Money is the root of all evil. Money to invest? Take it to the local branch of the Magic Memory Vault! Monsters come from nowhere to hit you everywhere. Monsters sleep because you are boring, not because they ever get tired. Most monsters prefer minced meat. That's why they are hitting you! Most rumors are just as misleading as this one. Much ado Nothing Happens. Murder complaint? Mail to 'netnix!devil!gamble!freak!trap!lastwill!rip'. Never ask a shopkeeper for a price list. Never attack a guard. Never fight a monster: you might get killed. Never kick a sleeping dog. Never map the labyrinth. Never mind the monsters hitting you: they just replace the charwomen. Never ride a long worm. Never trust a random generator in magic fields. Never use your best weapon to engrave a curse. Never vomit on a door mat. No weapon is better than a crysknife. Not all rumors are as misleading as this one. Not even a spear will hit a Xorn. One has to leave shops before closing time. One level further down somebody is getting killed, right now. One wand of concentration equals eight scrolls of create monster. Only a wizard can use a magic whistle. Only david can find the zoo! Only real trappers escape traps. Only wizards are able to zap a wand. Opening a tin is difficult, especially when you are not so strong! Opening a tin is difficult, especially when you attempt this bare handed! Operation coded OVERKILL has started now. PLEASE ignore previous rumour. Plain nymphs are harmless. Playing billiards pays when you are in a shop. Pursue the monsters and you will be had indeed. Put on a ring of teleportation: it will take you away from onslaught. Reading Tolkien might help you. Reading Herbert will disgust you, but in one case it might be enlightening. Reading might change your vision. Reading might improve your scope. Relying on a dog might turn you in a dog addict. Savings do include amnesia. Scorpions often hide under tripe rations. Screw up your courage! You've screwed up everything else. Second Law of Hacking: first in, first out. Shopkeepers accept creditcards, as long as you pay cash. Snakes are often found under worthless objects. Some monsters can be tamed. I once saw a hacker with a tame Dragon! Speed Kills (The Doors) Spinach, carrot, and a melon - a meal fit for a nurse! Stay clear of the level of no return. Suddenly the dungeon will collapse ... Take a long worm from the rear, according to its mate it's a lot more fun. Teleportation lessens your orientation. The Jackal only eats bad food. The Leprechaun Gold Tru$t is no division of the Magic Memory Vault. The Leprechauns hide their treasure in a small hidden room. The air is positively magic in here. Better wear a negative armor. The best equipment for your work is, of course, the most expensive. The emptiness of a ghost is too heavy to bear. The longer the wand the better. The secret of wands of Nothing Happens: try again! The use of dynamite is dangerous. There are monsters of softening penetration. There are monsters of striking charity. There have been people like you in here; their ghosts seek revenge on you. There is a VIP-lounge on this level. Only first-class travellers admitted. There is a big treasure hidden in the zoo! There is a message concealed in each fortune cookie. There is a trap on this level! There is more magic in this cave than meets the eye. There is no business like throw business. There is no harm in praising a large dog. There seem to be monsters of touching benevolence. They say that a dagger hits. They say that a dog avoids traps. They say that a dog can be trained to fetch objects. They say that a dog never steps on a cursed object. They say that a spear will hit a Dragon. They say that a spear will hit a Xorn. They say that a spear will hit a neo-otyugh. (Do YOU know what that is?) They say that a spear will hit an ettin. They say that a two-handed sword misses. They say that a unicorn might bring you luck. They say that an elven cloak may be worn over your armor. They say that an elven cloak protects against magic. They say that dead lizards protect against a cockatrice. They say that killing a shopkeeper brings bad luck. They say that monsters never step on a scare monster scroll. They say that only david can find the zoo! They say that the use of dynamite is dangerous. They say that there is a big treasure hidden in the zoo! They say that there is a message concealed in each fortune cookie. They say that there is a trap on this level! They say that throwing food at a wild dog might tame him. They say that you cannot trust scrolls of rumour. They say that you need a key in order to open locked doors. Third Law of Hacking: the last blow counts most. This is the Leprechaun Law: every purse has a price. Throwing food at a wild dog might tame him. Tin openers are rare indeed. To hit or not to hit, that is the question. Travel fast, use some magic speed! Tripe on its own is revolting, but with onions it's delicious! Try hacking in the wee hours: you will have more room. Vampires hate garlic. Visitors are requested not to apply genocide to shopkeepers. WARNING from H.M. Govt: Quaffing may be dangerous to your health. Watch your steps on staircases. Wear armor, going naked seems to offend public decency in here. What do you think would be the use of a sword called "Orcrist" ? When a piercer drops in on you, you will be tempted to hit the ceiling! When in a shop, do as shopkeepers do. When punished, watch your steps on the stairs! Why would anybody in his sane mind engrave "Elbereth" ? You are heading for head-stone for sure. You are just the kind of bad food some monsters like to digest. You can always wear an elven cloak. You can't leave a shop through the back door: there ain't one! You cannot trust scrolls of rumour. You feel greedy and want more gold? Why don't you try digging? You feel like someone is pulling your leg. You may have a kick from kicking a little dog. You might cut yourself on a long sword. You need a key in order to open locked doors. You want to regain strength? Two levels ahead is a guesthouse! You offend Shai-Hulud by sheathing your crysknife without having drawn blood. You'll need a spear if you want to attack a Dragon. You've got to know how to put out a yellow light. Zapping a wand of Nothing Happens doesn't harm you a bit.